In a murderous time, the heart breaks and breaks, and lives by breaking.

Clair remembers something super important and reaches in to her boot, pulling out a plastic card. "I knew I would need this!" She holds it out towards Joseph. "It's Preston's. Somehow Jessie got it, but I took it from her. That was like forever ago. I think now would be a good time to use it. Don't you agree?"

[Fighting? Fay is winning probably?]

Joseph looks conflicted. On the one hand, he isn't a fan of the whole makeover idea. On the other hand, he's been waiting a long time for fate to deliver unto Preston some form of retribution--but he gets tired of waiting. He could just deliver the retribution himself. "Well, I mean...it would be fun to screw up Preston's credit...."

[Fight fight battle. Seth accidentally does a thing to help Karen ]

Clair squeals with excitement, taking Joseph by the hand and squeezing way to hard. "I'm so excited! And don't feel bad. He deserves this, right? He deserves this. And you're gonna look so hot and he's gonna be so jealous."

[fight!]

Joseph starts to smile a little. "You really think so?"

[Quarrel]

Clair stands stops bouncing for practically the first time and looks confidently at Joseph, smiling back. "Absolutely."

[brawl]

Joseph finally looks up from the ground and into her eyes. "All right. Let's do this. Where first, the [he proceeds to pronounce four different designer stores completely incorrectly]?"

Clair rolls her eyes. "Maybe don't do that. We're going to [expertly pronounced designer store name] first because you need some smokin hot jeans." Still holding his hand, she pulls Joseph in to the store.

Clair rolls her eyes. "Maybe don't do that. We're going to [expertly pronounced designer store name] first because you need some smokin hot jeans." Still holding his hand, she pulls Joseph in to the store.

"Where?" Joseph stumbles in after her. He starts coughing. "What is that smell? Did they, like, spray perfume on every surface in here?"

Clair nods, taking a deep breath. "Isn't it just the best? It's really expensive, though. So you can't smell like this." She stays in on spot but looks around the signs for the men's section. "Wait wait, men's, right? Not boy's or anything weird?"

Joseph scrunched his nose. "It's horrible. And dude, I don't know.

Clair looks at Joseph like he's an idiot. "How can you not know? Who buys your clothes for you?" She finds the sign that says men's. "We're just gonna take a chance here." She drags him over to the section.

Joseph huffs. "My mom! And she does a pretty good job, I think." He looks around. "What is this? Wow, I didn't realize so many different kinds of jeans existed."

Clair laughs. "I bet your parents sent you to boarding school so you could finally learn to dress yourself." She runs her hands along the jeans. "Wowwie, these are the best.. What size are you?" She looks at the tags on the jeans.

Joseph scratches his head. "Um..boy-sized? Seventeen years old? Medium?"

Clair groan. "This is going to be really difficult, you know. But I'm sure we have plenty of time." She pulls three different pairs of jeans off the rack that look almost exactly the same. "You're probably gonna need all three, because you can't wear jeans like this to a movie theatre, and there is no way you could wear these to a party. And then these are casual but not to casual." She shoves them all at Joseph.

Joseph stumbles backward, almost falling over. "Why are these so heavy? God!" He adjusts himself; the top of his head is just barely visible behind the pile of jeans. "No, I mean, gosh. Gosh."

Clair sighs, realizing just how much work she signed herself up for. "Okay, lesson number one. It is totally okay to cuss in moderation. I mean, God isn't even a cuss word. Always say God, unless you're like talking to a baby or something. But yeah real cussing is alright. But not too much. Ya know? Like as much as I cuss. That's perfect."

Joseph sighs.

[cue makeover montage set to horrible pop music]

Clair is standing outside the dressing room when Joseph steps out, looking all snazzy in his new outfit. "Oh my god wow. You look 6000 times better. I would totally date you."

A worker folding shirts at a nearby table looks over and nods. He's like the obviously gay American that moved to Paris to work at a little boutique. "So would I. If you put any of that back on the shelf, you're some sort of criminal. Look at that butt. Mm mm."

Joseph blushes a new shade of red. "Oh...oh wow, oh goodness...I mean, oh my God... I mean, um, thank you." He looks in the guy's eyes for a moment, smiles a little, and then looks away.

Clair screams a little internally because of how adorable Joseph is. Then she laughs a little. "Haha, yeah. Joseph here is getting a new look."

Loufaun smiles again. "Joseph, huh? That's a classic. But you look more like a Joe or a Joey in that." He picks up a pile of shirts and starts to walk off, brushing off Joseph's jacket before he goes.

Joseph watches Loufaun walk away. "Joey," he says, as though he's trying it out. Seeing if it feels right, if he likes how it rolls off the tongue. After a moment, he smiles a lopsided smile. "I think I like that."

Clair squeals excitedly, jumping up and down a little. "Joey! Oh my god, how perfect. This is actually so perfect. We're buying everything, okay? Everything we picked up."

Joseph smiles sheepishly. "All right. Okay. Um, damn. Okay."